Eclipse -- Stephenie Meyer

The Short Version:

Dear Bella,

DUMP THEM BOTH.  Also, stop whining.  It's unattractive.

Thanks,
Leila

The (Slightly) Longer Version:

Seventy-five pages of entertainment does not counteract five hundred and twenty-five pages of guilt-ridden moaning. 

I have reached the point where I really don't understand why ANYONE is in love with Bella, let alone practically every male in the Forks area.

I'd rather read Jacob/Edward fan fiction. 

Bah!  BAH!!!

Comments

[charly]

I started reading the first one of these the other day, and ugh, they're so annoying!!

[Sarah Miller]

SO glad I didn't have a mouthful of hot tea when I came upon that!

[Moxie]

You are the best. That is all.

[cc]

I presume you will shortly be erasing your identity to go on the run?

(You couldn't get me to read those books with an electric cattle prod.)

[sassymonkey]

You said it! I get why Edward is nuts about her - the whole blood thing. But why Jacob too? BAH! It's gotten to the point where I don't like any of the characters. Except maybe Alice.

[Nonanon]

Ha! Don't go on the run. The rest of us who have had just about enough of the series will defend you. Personally, I think Jacob can do better and Edward's too boring for words. Time for a series about Alice, I agree with Sassymonkey.

[Katie]

Thanks for the warning. I'm still waiting for my hold to come in, but maybe I won't read it after all. The crying and whining was nearly too much for me in New Moon. Sounds like it only got worse. Out of curiosity, which 75 pages were entertaining? Maybe I could just skip to those.

[Kailana]

Bella has gotten progressively worse since the first book. I read the first book, I complained she was annoying, I read the second book, she annoyed me even more, I started the third book and it is not done because honest to god Bella has to be one of the most annoying characters ever! And a love triangle, okay in New Moon, bad when it becomes one of the major themes to your series.

[Chrissy]

Thank you everyone! I read the first book and enjoyed it and have been avoiding reading any further. Now I don't have to keep fretting over whether I should. Sounds like I'm good right where I am.

[Gwen]

Thank GOD I am not alone in this! I thought maybe I was just getting too old and cranky (because honestly, staying 18 forever with a 17-year-old husband, no matter how hot, sounds kind of dreadful to me).

[ali]

I knew I had had enough of Bella when I was wishing I was a vampire so I could have the pleasure of killing her myself! I think saying 75 pages were exciting is pushing it.

[Erin]

I'm 3/4 of the way through this book and I'm definitely starting to feel you. If I have to read, "I'm plain, I'm unfashionable, I have to be part of the battle even though someone will probably rip my head off or die because of it" one more time -- I may give up. I was hoping the ending would redeem the novel for me, but I'm guessing from your description that it didn't.

[Kelly Fineman]

Ha.

Ha ha.

Hahahahahahahaha! Thank you for that!

[TadMack]

L, I'd stick with the short version. I, too, read Book 1, was mildly diverted but mostly annoyed, and Book 2, was largely annoyed and not much diverted. I don't think I'm going to go there with Book 3 unless I am very, VERY bored on a deserted island somewhere...

[a Paperback Writer]

I'm glad to hear others' opinions about this.
My biggest issue with the books is that Bella's a wimp. (Okay, I haven't read book 3 yet, but your comments tell me she hasn't changed much.) She gives up all sense of self to wrap her life around a guy. Okay, so he's hot, but still.... We grown up women know all too well what happens to gals who throw away their own lives to be the support system to some man: the jerk leaves and the gal is left with no education and no career and no life.
I'm fine with adult women reading these books instead of trashy checkout line romance novels, and I even like them for a fun, light read (sorry if that bothers anyone), but I worry when my junior high students (girls) read these books because I fear they'll absorb Bella's attitude and make it their own.
Now, THAT'S scarier than vampires and werewolves.

[celerysoda]

Wow... I was hoping that "New Moon" was sophomore slump and that "Eclipse" would come back with a bang. Guess not! I think I'll save my eyesight for something more deserving. What a bummer.

[cat]

Well now, I thought that the first book was terrific! The second book? Not so much. I was so disappointed when she introduced werewolves. The whole werewolf vs vampire thing has been done to death. And dude! If I wanted to read about werewolves? I would! I want to read about VAMPIRES in this book. And I can't stand Bella. I used to think Edward was cool, not anymore. And I never liked Jacob.

And your post just made me laugh out loud for the first time today. THANK YOU!

[web]

Just from a skim, I think you're spot on.

[Lisa]

I waited until just this July to read books 1 and 2. My initial impression was "these are the dumbest books I have ever read, but I can't seem to put them down." Since 3 followed so quickly on, I figured, eh, why not? Glad I did, because that got it out of my system quick. My take is that there is a certain type of book that is going to appeal to a certain type of person of a certain age, e.g., The Fountainhead or most books by Anne Rice. Or for those of us old enough to know better, sometimes a book recalls a certain fantasy, a little pinprick to bring back adolescent yearnings (who wouldn't love having the most beautiful boy you ever saw fall in love with you?). Still the dumbest books I ever read, though.

[Lisa]

I waited until just this July to read books 1 and 2. My initial impression was "these are the dumbest books I have ever read, but I can't seem to put them down." Since 3 followed so quickly on, I figured, eh, why not? Glad I did, because that got it out of my system quick. My take is that there is a certain type of book that is going to appeal to a certain type of person of a certain age, e.g., The Fountainhead or most books by Anne Rice. Or for those of us old enough to know better, sometimes a book recalls a certain fantasy, a little pinprick to bring back adolescent yearnings (who wouldn't love having the most beautiful boy you ever saw fall in love with you?). Still the dumbest books I ever read, though.

[Jade]

I occasionally read your blog, and someone pointed me in this direction today, so I have to leave a comment saying HAHAHA. So true. I've only read Twilight, and everyone tells me I need to read the others but I'm kind of dreading it. (My reaction to Twilight was not to write a letter to Bella, but to script an intervention for Edward telling him to GET OVER HIMSELF.) As Lisa said, "These are the dumbest books I have ever read, but I can't seem to put them down." I giggled my way through Twilight and then put it down feeling guilty that I'd even been partially amused. Blech.

[Julie]

Here is my letter:

Bella,
Please send all diamonds, Porches, tuition cash, and extra boyfriends that you DON'T want to me.
Thanks.

What is WRONG with her? Why is she so whiny and grumpy in this one? How tedious.

[Rivkah]

I've only read the first book, but when I got to the part where Bella discovers that the reason vampires can't go out in daylight is because they are sparkly, I put the book down so I could hold my sides while I laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed.

[Petrichor]

RIGHT ON. Bella, you're annoying! Edward, you're boring! Jacob, get over it!
Yeesh. I have no interest in reading the fourth one (yes, there's ANOTHER coming) whatsoever.

[Mara]

Beautiful. Described most of my reactions to this entire series in 100 words or less.