A loaf of bread, a container of milk, and a stick of butter...

Or, a stuck umbrella, a container of milk, and a possibly rabid chihuahua:

I braced the umbrella's end-knob against my thigh and jammed my palm against the top. No dice. Too unstable. The umbrella wobbled and slid off my leg, which I suppose is a testament to my svelte physique, but was no damn good while I was trying to forcibly restrain an errant rain-gear accessory. So I turned to a broader, flatter surface -- my stomach. I braced the end-knob against my belly button and wrestled with the far end of the umbrella. It probably looked like I was trying to commit seppuku with a rolling pin wearing a raincoat, but there you go.

Perfect reading for a Monday morning.  Don't miss it.

Comments

[Kelly Fineman]

I no longer need to workout today (not that I would have, but I would have needed to). The sustained, abdomen-tightening laughter did the trick.

[Brian F.]

Holy flashback, Batman. That subject line just sent me spiraling back to first grade. It's bizarre the repetitive patterns that get lodged in your brain at that age and stay there for eternity.

[Caitorade]

Your entry's title sent me on the wildest goose chase! I thought, here's a phrase I know and am suddenly so attached to I could put it on a t-shirt. ;) Finally found out it was a Sesame Street skit done with funky Jim Simon animation.

Thanks for the adventure!